A sensitive soul....my son.
A sensitive soul since he was little...a space or protective 'bubble' around himself at times noticeably larger than other children have. Interactions, human interactions, interactions for the first time with unknown people are scary, intimidating for him. Being the center of attention, all eyes on him is scary, intimidating for him. We all have our own space tolerance although I think when someone over steps it we handle it, we adjust- he hasn't learned how yet, it truly bothers him, makes him cry at times, makes him angry at times. We work on this every day. I remind myself of patience, understanding, love, compassion for what his soul goes through as we go through these situations with him. Perfectly fine once someone or a group is no longer a stranger, after a comfort is found, after a trust is bonded after a connection formed...but the start, the beginning- so very hard. Like a little hermit crab, sinking into his shell, peering out- wanting to be part of the interactions, not knowing how, afraid, slowly but surely after several times, coming out all the way to enjoy the light, enjoy the interaction. I pray for guidance frequently as I learn to guide him, be there for him, support him.
So proud today that we entered one of those interactions, a new youth group. He tried and I'm proud of him for that. He sat and watched, then he interacted, then he needed to be away- so we sat quietly outside, he then voiced he was ready to go back in and join in, we watched more, he interacted more, then we again left the group to get some fresh air once again and he voiced he was done for right now. So, we did not go back in but waited until his sister was done.
I will never give up on him, I will always be there, whether its just the comfort of me sitting near him in silence or speaking reassuring words to him. I will keep taking him to new places, with new people and new interactions, to help him, teach him, guide him. It may take time but I have all the time in the world for my children.
Patience, Understanding, Love, Compassion